You got your whiskey bottle there
Now you don't even move out of your chair
You're gettin' juiced up beyond belief
I can barely love you when you're gettin' drunk all the time

You can get out a blow dryer and blow dry the hair right off of your head
You can sautee my dollar bills and feed 'em to the dog while he's watching cable
If I catch fire by mistake, she'll put out my face with a rake and shut my mouth before I even breathe
Well, I can barely touch you, honey, 'cause you're gettin' drunk all the time

Got radioactive tastebuds smeared across the rug
Swallow the keys to the Chevy, you're gonna weedwhack your way to Memphis
Well everybody knows about your style, you got tin foil wrapped around your smile
Well you're gonna give a Xerox of your buckteeth, gettin' crapfaced all the time

Yodelay, yodela-ee